Day 4

Thought I'd be okay but today, I started missing you again. Sunday. I used to think that this was a special day for both of us. I just realized that I was the only one who thought of that. We used to spend a lot of time together especially on a Sunday. I never expected anything from you today. Space remember? Screw that. I wouldn't waste a cent on that crap. Yeah, I miss you. The good times we shared. Good memories made me cry (Turn Back Time by Aqua: If only I could turn back time. If only I had said what I still hide...) I was at work and you were in God-knows-where doing God-knows-what with God-knows-who. Yay, do I sound like a blasphemer or just an utter tool? Whatevs. I felt so alone in a four-cornered soundproof room. I started keeping myself busy by typing words that you're reading right now. It was a gloomy afternoon. It was raining hard. I can hear thunder and see lightning from the glass window. (Thunder by Boys Like Girls: Your voice was the soundtrack of my summer do you know you're unlike any other you'll always be my thunder...) I played songs that I can relate into coz there's a need for me to pour my heart out. (You Don't See Me: Josie and The Pussycats: This is the part where it hurts. This is the part where I love you too much. Is this how hard as it gets... [the whole-ass song] ) I looked like a crybaby and I still played your favorite song (Just Say Yes by Snow Patrol: Just say yes. la la la la la. I can feel your heart beat through my shirt...) I tried surviving that day but I just can't get you out of my head. You were in everything I see and I don't know if I can still be happy knowing that you're no longer with me. I tried surviving this day. I tried.